Journal Entries for BBWDOM4MARRIAGE: Pt 2

Yes, I realize the artwork is no longer there. They removed it, for some reason. Maybe I'll refind it, later in life, or, maybe I'll just wait and post it again, later, separate from these things.  7/14/2011 3:53:05 PM You know, what I would want from a slave is not 24/7 groveling, adherence to a very strict set of rules that are impossible to live with so that I have maximum excuse to punish him for failure. etc. That is all negative. Why would I want to increase the negativity in my life?   If I had a slave, I'd want him to be fully obedient, when obedience was required - which is all the time in some ways, and, sometimes in others - just like when you work for someone, and, they don't want you drifting away to go play video games, when you are helping a client, but, they don't mind if you leave your desk to use the restroom once the client is gone.     Respect would need to be 24/7, and, so would open lines of communication, at least to the extent of letting people know where you are, and, when you are likely to be back - just like when you work for someone, and, they expect you to be in at 8 am, but, you've gotten a flat tire, so you call in and tell them that you have to change your tire, and, you think you'll be about three hours late, since you need to stop and buy a new spare, as well.    Potential obedience, potential entertainment, potential service, needs, as much as possible, to be 24/7 Which means, if I order you out of bed to wash dishes, nip off to the store, etc., you go.  Even if you have been allowed out, and, you are in someone else's bed, you go. You don't turn off the ringer and make excuses, and, you don't consult her needs before mine. It also means if I tell you that Wednesday is laundry day, but, then I switch it to inviting six dommes over to ride on your back, in turns, while cropping your arse day, you're going to do that, instead, and, still figure out how to get the laundry done, at some point.   The relationship, in other words, is 24/7. The actual duties and entertainments might not take that long, and, quite frankly, I don't really need you around that much. I have my limits, too, and, one of them is all about a need for private thought, and, another is quiet time, in which to work.    If I had a husband, I'd say much the same, except, he had better never be in someone else's bed!

7/14/2011 1:19:04 PM If you are actively seeking something I am not, or, claiming to be something I do not want, I probably will not consider you. It does no good telling me that your profile just has a mistake on it - especially when I know you've had the same 'mistake' for years, and, I've pointed it out to you, before. Even more especially when you don't correct it, never have, and, never will.  The mistake is in you coming to one of the few sites where you can openly be yourself and express your desires, seeking people who will fit your needs, and, yet, still insisting on being a cowardly liar.  Also, for the record, except for brief flashes of lack of control, which I choose to attempt to correct rather than make into a lifestyle choice, I do not have dark desires.  I have light, fruity, let's all have a good, fun time without offending God or too many other people, in fact, let's help them build a house or buy shoes for their kids, desires.  Now, some of you may think that means I am 'vanilla' and that I do not have any 'kink', but, that only makes you close-minded boring people, or, ignorant, at best. I have plenty of interest in whips, chains, bondage, obedience, all sorts of things that would fall under some people's 'dark desires'. The difference is that I, unlike them, am not ashamed of those interests and I have no need to take that shame out on the body, mind, or spirit of others. It's all just good clean fun, whether shared by friends or shared with a special lover.

7/14/2011 11:22:57 AM My last posting of my artwork, for now. These are all things that are all mine -created by me, owned by me - which I am posting to share with people, for the sake of getting to know each other better. They are not for sale, here, and, you do not have permission to use them, beyond viewing them on my profile: this is true for all artwork I have posted or may post, including writing. Ask for permission, if you want it, and, maybe I'll give it to you.  This last one I am particularly proud of, as the majority of the image is from a painting that I made - acrylic, on canvas. I had scanned it, and, then, decided to make digital images out of parts of it, as well, as separate artwork, that is. To do this, I cropped them, added more 'canvas' where necessary, and, added to what was there through digital painting. This one involved, basically, creating half the flower, making it look like it belonged as part of the painting, as that's how much of it existed as part of the painting, and, I think it looks pretty skippy. Much better than I hoped for, anyway.

7/14/2011 11:11:51 AM And, even more artwork, of mine, created by me, owned by me, legally distributed  by me through the sharing I am doing right now. Feel free to look at it. Do not take this as an attempt to sell or give a gift, other than the gift of current eye candy and further understanding. A photograph of a particularly strange winter day in the Arizona desert, in between Tucson and nowhere.

7/14/2011 11:00:56 AM More artwork, that is mine, as in I created it. I am not attempting to sell it, or, persuade you to go find it, on other sites. This is just to give you some idea of what I do, with some of my 'free' time: This is a self portrait (from a few years ago), called Chinese Fan, which is a play on words, as the patterns in the background, and, on my face, were patterns I had seen in Chinese fans, and, I love Chinese (or, indeed, most Asian) cooking, clothing, furniture, etc.; but, also, I have (some) Chinese ancestry.

7/14/2011 10:45:52 AM This is still a posting of my own, original artwork, that I created, and, which I am sharing with you, solely for the sake of getting to know each other. I am not making an offers, or, any demands. It is only sharing. Digital painting, inspired by someone's blogging about India, talk of Lotus Eaters, etc. This is one of a few different variations, actually steps toward the creation of a digital painting to beguile someone lovely. Some of the steps were beautiful enough, to me, that I had to save them as separate pieces, even though they were not exactly where I was heading to.

7/14/2011 10:38:30 AM This is some of my artwork. MY artwork, as in I actually created it, and, so, have full legal right to show it, wherever I want, whenever I want, unless the site prohibits the posting of any artwork (as opposed to just commercial artwork) or for some other reason prohibits, say, the sharing of images.  Yes, this artwork is for sale, somewhere else, but, I am not posting it here to tell you, ask you, or, entice you to buy it. I am just sharing something of myself with you, for the sake of getting to know each other better. No, I do not normally preface the showing of artwork with rambling diatribes - lol - but, considering I tried to do this, yesterday, and, they all got deleted, as if there is some policy against people sharing their own artwork on this site; and, that, despite the many, many profiles that are sharing artwork created by someone else, who did not give permission for their artwork t be shown, too! This first one is hand drawn, then, scanned for sharing. Scanning is great for showing you where all the flaws in your work are, but, I like it, all the same. This is a digital painting. Please do not confuse it with digital manipulation. Digital painting means it was made digitally, but, otherwise with much the same techniques as one would use to paint on canvas.

7/14/2011 9:32:36 AM What in the ...  I made some journal entries, yesterday, sharing some of my artwork, older photos of myself, some links to now defunct blogs which certain people might find of interest, and, they are all gone! So, are the other journal entries, including the one where I am quoting a man who says, in the quote, that he doesn't mind if I quote him! This is crazy! To Support: Why would you guys delete my journal entries? I can understand the one, only the one, where I directly quoted another member who was insulting me, sort of. Except that he saw it, along with the explanation of why he was so offensive, and, he came back and apologized, so, actually, my post - which everyone has fair warning I might make, due to the heading of my profile - helped promote peace and understanding between members. Then, there was the one from Rex Lobo, where he wrote to me, with great compliments, and, told me he wouldn't mind being quoted by me. So, there is no excuse for deleting it.  Especially as many people on this site have journal entries that directly quote other members, in the same way I did, and, they do not even give warning, on their profile, that this is a thing they are likely to do. The other journal entries were of my artwork, some blogs of mine, etc.  They were not selling anything, they were not stealing anything from anyone, they were not promoting anything illegal, and, they were not promoting any other sites. They were me, sharing things with the people who want to know them. So, why would you delete them?

7/12/2011 2:44:22 PM hahaha Since I made that profile warning, I have heard from no one.

7/11/2011 5:53:41 PM How to get rid of a man in one easy step: 1. Ask /order him to do something. Want to stretch it out to two steps:1. Write something 2. Ask/order him to read it. Tadah! They are all gone now. Well, one of them I was just truthful to, as to why he is not my type, but, might be my sisters.

7/11/2011 11:12:51 AM How do I make this very clear? Well, that's always the challenge, isn't it? I do not want the man who announces he is here to explore his dark desires, who thinks casual sex is a great and wonderful thing ...  I want the man who struggles between his relationship with God, his loneliness, and, his desire for wild, romantic emotional and physical passion in his life, which sometimes leads him to do stupid things, like join sites like this, searching for something he has about zero hope of finding - a woman who is dominant, without being a cruel horror; who has a high sex drive, without being a slut or someone who will cheat on him;  a woman who will guide him in how to please her, but, who will not despise him for trying, or, view him as less of a man for it; but, a woman who will honor him, respect him, and, be able to live together with him, in dual strength, supporting each other, respecting each other, sharing a life together, fixing their home together, and, absolutely, having a great deal of fun, together - sexually, yes, but, in many other ways, too.

Journal Entries for BBWDOM4MARRIAGE:

7/15/2011 1:30:12 PM

I'm sure it won't last long, but, I am leaving, and, before I go, I'd like to share with what i wrote to them, where it asks for the reason :  This site is rife with silly bitches, male and female; false profiles; women who rule the forum with stinky iron cootchies; and, the SUPPORT is utterly laughable. Goodbye. I hope you get shut down soon. I know it is rather short and subtle, but, I do hope they can read between the lines and get the salient points, all the same. 7/15/2011 12:05:26 PM I think most people have sub and slave firmly confused in their minds. I say this, as I just read a profile, again, where a person claimed to be a different sort of sub, but, definitely sub and not slave; and, why are they different? Because, they have a mind and a will of their own, their own personality, they won't just give in to your whims, etc;, but, they will obey, once they find the person who suits their needs. Honey, that's not submissive! And, even more so, it is not being a submissive.  A submissive submits. That's what they do. They need someone to control them, cajole them into doing what the other person wills, as that is how they get their kicks.  If you're a female who does not want that, but, who does want a strong man who will protect you, guide you, show you how to please him, use your body for his private entertainment, and, allow you to fetch him dinner and sit at your feet, you probably are, after all, just a woman. No other title needed. A slave has their own free will - contrary to popular belief- and they are expected to use their own mind. Because, with slaves, it is not about them being controlled, so much as them giving, sharing, getting things done, feeling accomplished. Slaves may submit, but, they are not submissives, and, they are not always submissive, either.  Example:  Tell a submissive to lay down on their tummy, hands behind their back, and, not to move, no matter what, and, they will not move, no matter what. At least, that is true, until you pushed them too far. Tell them not to speak and you better hope they didn't leave rice cooking on the back burner, or, you'll end up with a stinky house and a very bad dinner. Do the same thing with a slave, and, perhaps they'll do it, if they know they have free time. Otherwise, they will probably remind you of the rice cooking on the stove, and, ask permission to finish dinner first, if that's what is going on. Or, they might ask for clarification on the change of schedule. They have things to do, people to take care of. Yes, they know they may get beat for failure to submit, but, submission is not their primary function, service is. And, sometimes service means being in adverse situations wherein you must disobey, at least a little, to keep things functional.  Am I getting the point across? Slaves do not subsume their will to yours. What they love is duty, well thought out strategy, clearly defined ways of living. Soldiers make good slaves, specifically because they come pre-trained in how to balance their life of service with their day to day 'regular' life, and, to be proud of their accomplishments, when they have done their duty well and obeyed effectively, whether the duty was storming a beach front or digging a ditch. But, look at them. They are not wimpy, they do not grovel, they have completely free will, and, by their free will, choose to follow either the protocols and regulations, or the person who has captured their heart by their ability to lead. They'd prefer the latter, but, the former will do.  That's what a slave is. A slave will be told 'Here are the protocols.' and they will learn them, and, go on with their duties and be proud of what they have achieved, even if they have zero respect for their owner. It is not their job to love their owner, though it is preferable. It is their job to perform their duties well. Submissives need to believe that whatever their owner does is right, though. Submissives make lousy soldiers, as they cannot balance the dichotomy of the differing lifestyles into one whole life, and, they cannot choose whether to follow the rule or the ruler. They do not think well on their feet, and, they are not capable of choosing their own path, then, accepting the consequences, later, because, it is unthinkable to disobey.  Slaves disobey, when it is necessary. If a slave fully obeys your order, they are probably doing it out of spite. If they obey the spirit of your order, rather than the actual contents, they are probably doing it out of respect. Why? Because, most orders are given rather hastily, and, badly.  'Go in the bathroom and fetch me the pink towel.' you will say. However, the pink towel is not in the bathroom, but, the blue one is. This stops a submissive cold. You've just gone beyond their ability to follow an order. They stop dead in their tracks, or, they return to you for clarification. Not much gets done with submissives, when they are in mode anyway, but, they can be fun to play with. The slave would go in, see the blue towel is there, assess the situation, and, then make the best guess, based on their knowledge of you, what to do. They might bring the blue towel, they might go to where the pink towel is and fetch it, or, they might bring you both, and, let you decide which one you truly want.   Again, the one is focusing on the order, the other is focusing on the task needing to be accomplished Submissives are inherently more selfish than slaves in that way. It's all 'me, me, me' with submissives 'I obey you. I grovel. I need orders.' versus a slave's 'Do you need me to serve you? Would you like some tea? Do you want me to kneel?' It's a hard thing, to see the distinction, at times, but, in the end, the difference will out.

When it come to marriage ...

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